Passion Play: Celestial Soul-Mates, Book 3 Read online

  The thought of giving herself over to Terrien and the love that she now realized so clearly pulsed through her…terrified her. A blind terror she could not even comprehend.

  But the pain in Terrien’s eyes haunted her.

  Crystal clasped Eva’s hand and squeezed, then stood. Crystal avoided looking at Terrien as she crossed the room.

  Silently, Crystal followed Terrien back to their quarters. As soon as the door closed behind them, Crystal headed into her bedroom, unable to face Terrien right now. The door closed behind her, and she stripped off her dress and climbed into bed, then pulled the covers around her.

  Oh, God, what would she do now?

  Terrien had lain in bed all night, staring at Crystal’s closed door, longing for her to be in his arms. Longing for her body pressed close to his. It tore at his heart that she’d gone to Larson yesterday, but then she’d closed herself away in her room. Closing herself off from him.

  He pushed himself from his bed and showered, then trod into the kitchen. He made coffee and an omelet for her, intending to knock on her door to invite her to join him for breakfast once it was done. As he placed it on the plate, however, he felt her presence behind him. He turned to see her watching him from the doorway, wearing a blue robe.

  “Good morning,” he said.

  “Good morning.” Her gaze slipped from his, and she poured herself a cup of coffee.

  “Did you sleep well?” he asked.

  “No.” She sipped her coffee. “I…thought about a lot of things.”

  His heart clenched. Was this a good or bad thing? From the way she avoided his gaze, he was afraid it was bad.

  He handed her the plate.

  “Thanks. It smells good.” She took the plate and sat at the table.

  He served up his own omelet and sat across from her. They ate in silence. If she wanted to talk to him about her thoughts, it seemed she was waiting until after breakfast.

  Definitely a bad thing.

  Once she’d finished her meal, he gathered her plate and his and set them aside.

  “So you thought about a lot of things last night. Would you like to share some of your thoughts?”

  She gazed at him and nodded. Her forlorn expression told him this was a very bad thing.

  “I…” She shook her head and sucked in a breath. “I don’t want to hurt you, but…”

  Heghat. His heart clenched. He was sure he didn’t want to hear this.

  “I can’t do this,” she continued. “I can’t be your tanashay. I can’t stay on this ship or your planet. I need to be free. I need to be independent.”

  “I don’t intend to take away your independence.”

  She leaned forward. “Terrien, I can’t do it. No matter what you intend, I will be on a different planet. I will have to depend on you. I don’t know your culture. I don’t know how to get a job or even what I’d do. I don’t even know your language.”

  “Language is not an issue. You can learn it easily. We have technology to allow you to absorb a new language quickly and effortlessly. And as for a job, we don’t have money. People are provided with all the basics, and they can earn extra credit for luxuries if they wish. Since you are an artist, you will not only have total freedom to live and do whatever you want, you will have the means to live a very luxurious life.”

  “I’m not an artist. I paint as a hobby, but I can’t make a living at it.”

  She’d been passionate about her art in high school, but she hadn’t wanted to wind up like her mother, with no reliable way to support herself. Her sister had talked her into a career in marketing where, theoretically, she could make use of her artistic ability. Unfortunately, that hadn’t happened, but she did earn a reasonable living.

  “On Sa’oul you can. All art is held in high esteem, and since you are from another world, your work will be highly sought after. Believe me, Crystal, you will not be dependent on anyone.”

  Crystal drew in a deep breath and stared at her hands, her fingers interlaced.

  It would be wonderful to spend her days painting rather than working in marketing at the hotel. But that was only one concern about being dependent on Terrien. The bigger concern—the one she could not get past—was her dependence on him sexually.

  No, not sexually. It was because—her heart clenched painfully—she was in love with him, and a woman in love made poor decisions. She’d seen that over and over again with her mother.

  Crystal knew she could not let a man, or her emotions for a man, control her. She knew she had to walk away, no matter how much it would hurt.

  She stood up, her hands clenched into fists.

  “Terrien, the point is I am not your soul-mate. I don’t believe in soul-mates, and I don’t intend to marry you, or live with you, or whatever it is you’re expecting. I have a life on Earth, and I’m happy with it. If you really care for me…you’ll take me back to Earth.”

  “Crystal…”

  She hazarded a glance at his face and wished she hadn’t. The agony in his eyes tore through her.

  “You can’t mean it.”

  She nodded, tearing her gaze from his. “I do. If you really love me, let me go.”

  She turned around and strode back to her bedroom.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Hours had passed since Crystal had made her request. Since then, she’d stayed in her room, expecting Terrien to come in and talk to her, to try to convince her to stay with him. But he didn’t. Thank heavens.

  “Crystal, may I come in?” Terrien’s voice sounded through a speaker in the room.

  She sighed and stood up, then crossed the room and opened the door.

  He stood in the doorway, tall and rigid, facing her. “Do you understand if you go back to Earth, you will continue to feel our connection? Without me there to satisfy your yearning, it will be an agony that eats at you forever.”

  “You think a lot of yourself.” Her light tone did not decrease the intensity of his dark green eyes.

  “I’m not joking. It will never diminish,” he insisted. “You know what I’m talking about. Even if you don’t admit it, you felt it before I brought you here. It started slowly, then increased until it became almost unbearable. No man could satisfy the need.”

  Yes, she remembered. It had been totally frustrating, in more ways than one, but she hadn’t understood it then. Now she did, and she would find a way to deal with it.

  He stepped toward her and reached for her hand, but she stepped back. His mouth compressed into a straight line.

  “Don’t think because I will be back on Sa’oul that it will fade. Once the connection has been made, it is with you always.”

  She nodded. “So I’m always going to be hot for you. And I’ll miss you. I’ll learn to live with that.”

  He took her hand again but this time didn’t let go when she tried to draw away. He stroked her hair from her face with such gentleness, tears prickled at her eyes.

  “Why can’t you just accept what there is between us? I love you.”

  Her heart ached, and she blinked back tears, keeping them in check. “I’m sorry, Terrien, but…I just don’t love you.” It was the biggest lie of her life, but she had to say it. “Please, take me home.”

  He frowned, his green eyes glittering with emotion.

  Finally, he released her hand and turned his back on her. “Pull your stuff together,” he said in a hard voice as he walked through his bedroom toward the other door. “We leave in an hour.”

  Crystal glanced around at her familiar living room. She stood in her own apartment. On Earth.

  The trip with Terrien aboard the small spacecraft had taken only a few hours. He said the smaller craft could travel at much higher speeds than the bulkier spaceship that had to carry so many people. She didn’t understand the science behind it any more than she understood how a television worked, but she was thankful that she’d only had to spend a few hours with him rather than several days.

  “Thank you. I appreciate you bring
ing me back.”

  Terrien simply nodded. He stood only feet from her, but she felt like he was miles away. Ever since she’d asked him to bring her back to Earth, he’d put up a barrier.

  And, of course, that made sense, but the distance between them disturbed her.

  Well, get used to it. Soon he’ll be gone. For good.

  “I have to leave.”

  “Oh, do you have time for a coffee or something?” Damn. How totally lame.

  “No, I need to pick up something, then return to the ship.”

  She nodded. “Okay, well… I guess this is good-bye.”

  The coolness in his eyes faltered, and he stepped forward. “Crystal, are you sure you want to do this?”

  Her heart ached, and uncertainty swirled through her. But she had to be strong.

  “I’m staying here, Terrien.” She couldn’t resist. She raised her hand and stroked his cheek, then along his rigid jaw. “I’m sorry.”

  Suddenly, she was in his arms, pressed tight to his solid body, his mouth invading hers. His tongue sought hers. She succumbed to the sweet passion and melted against him, devouring his mouth as he devoured hers. Her body aching for him, her heart hammering in time with his.

  Then he released her and stepped back.

  He stared at her, and the silence hung between them. She wanted to lurch forward and tell him she would go back with him. She would be his soul-mate and wife, and they would live happily ever after together.

  But real life wasn’t like that.

  Clearly, he saw the determination in her eyes. He sighed.

  “Good-bye, Crystal.”

  He pulled a small controller from his pocket and pushed a button. Then he was gone.

  Crystal glanced around her apartment, feeling a little out of place. Here she was, back at home after travelling in a spaceship far from Earth. She should be happy to be home, but it all seemed a little…anticlimactic.

  She walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge door, but all that was there were a few vodka coolers, some wilted lettuce, a half carton of milk she hadn’t finished before she’d left on vacation, and some condiments. She grabbed a cooler and opened it, then poured it into a tall glass and added ice. She’d have to go out shopping and get some food, but that could wait until she was a little more settled in again.

  She walked into the spare bedroom she had set up as her office and turned on the computer. Checking email seemed like a nice, ordinary task to pull her back into her regular life again. To help her feel settled.

  Because right now she felt anything but settled. In fact, she felt very unsettled, her insides fluttering as if filled with butterflies. She was home. She should be happy.

  But she wasn’t. Memories of Terrien washed through her, and her heart ached.

  She opened her browser and glanced through the inbox at the long list of unread messages, then tried to lose herself in the mindless task of sorting through them. They were mostly newsletters she subscribed to, bill notifications, messages from Facebook friends, et cetera.

  Time slipped away, but thoughts of Terrien didn’t.

  She could feel the urgent longing she’d experienced before he’d come into her life, but now she recognized it for what it was. Back then, it had felt like lust. And it had been, in part. A need to join with him. To have him inside her body. Joined in an intimate way. In a loving way.

  At first, since she’d never met him—didn’t even know he existed—it had hit her as a physical need for sex, but no man had satisfied that need because none of them had been the man she needed. The man she was meant to be with.

  That man was Terrien.

  Oh, God. What had she done?

  This feeling inside her—this longing that gnawed at her insides—was a longing for him. And it would never diminish. It would never go away.

  Oh, God, she was in love with Terrien. And she’d sent him away. Forever. He was gone from her life, and she couldn’t do anything about it.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Crystal stood and walked to the window, then stared out at the city below. There were people all around her—in the apartments surrounding hers, on the sidewalks below…in the restaurants, coffee shops, stores, and cars travelling along the streets. But not one could fill the need inside her.

  Only Terrien could do that. Only he could fill her life with joy.

  Damn it, why had she run away from what they had?

  She needed to be independent. She needed control over her own life, but he’d never tried to control her. He’d even agreed to bring her home when she’d insisted, despite the fact that he knew that would steal away his happiness forever.

  She clenched her fists. The stupid thing was, she had actually let her fear of being controlled control her. She had been more afraid of that than losing the man she loved. The only man who could make her happy.

  And now she’d pay the price.

  They’d both pay the price for her stupidity.

  If only she had another chance. If only…

  A knock sounded at her door, and she dashed the tears from her eyes. Tears she hadn’t even realized she’d shed. She walked out the office door to the hallway, thankful for something to take her mind off the pain, but as she walked into the living room, she remembered Terrien standing in this room only a couple of hours ago, and the tears welled again.

  A knock sounded again. It must be the building manager, because anyone else would have had to buzz the intercom. She snatched a tissue from the box beside the couch and dried her eyes, then opened the door.

  “Hello.” There stood Terrien, his large muscular frame filling her doorway.

  “Terrien?” The shock held her poised for only a split second; then she launched herself into his arms.

  He tightened them around her in a solid embrace as she consumed his mouth, gliding her tongue inside, following a primal need to join with him in some way. He thrust into her mouth and practically devoured her. He lifted her from the ground and carried her inside, kicking the door closed behind them.

  As her feet touched the ground again, she released his lips and stared into his glittering green eyes. Then he smiled, lighting up his entire face, and joy washed through her.

  “Miss me?” he asked.

  Damn, he looked so smug. He knew this would happen!

  In answer, she stripped off her top and pulled down the cups of her bra, revealing her hard, aroused nipples. Then she stroked over the growing bulge in his pants.

  “As much as you missed me.” She unzipped him, then reached inside and found his hot, hard cock.

  He groaned as she stroked him.

  “Oh, God, Crystal.” He backed her against the wall, his eyes smoldering with need.

  He unfastened her jeans and she pushed them down, her panties along with them. She took his hand and placed it over her pussy, then guided his finger along her slick opening.

  “I want you, Terrien.” She grasped his cock and placed the tip against her slit. He groaned, then pushed forward, filling her with his incredibly thick cock. She gasped at the astonishing pleasure it gave her. Not just physical, but deep in her heart. She leaned forward and nibbled his ear. As he drew back and glided into her again, she murmured, “I love you, Terrien.”

  He stopped, fully impaled inside her, with her crushed against the wall, and he stared at her.

  The profound glow of love in his eyes sent her heart into a spin.

  Then he smiled. “I love you too, Crystal.”

  His lips met hers, and passion consumed them both. He drew back and thrust forward again. Then again. Without warning, a wave of absolute joy washed over her, then catapulted to full-fledged ecstasy. She moaned as he drove into her, sending her to heights she’d never even dreamed of. As bliss exploded through her, she clung to him, knowing she would never let go of this man ever again. She was his. And he was hers. They belonged together.

  As she gasped for breath, he nuzzled her neck.

  “Does this mean you’ve changed y
our mind?” Terrien murmured against her skin.

  “No, of course not.”

  His head jerked up so fast she worried he’d have whiplash. She had to stop herself from laughing out loud.

  “I still love you,” she said, a devilish smile on her face.

  He still seemed uncertain, and now she felt cruel. She grabbed his collar and pulled him toward her for another kiss.

  “I want to go home.”

  “You are home, Crystal.”

  She shook her head. “No.” She glanced around. “This is just an apartment.” She locked gazes with him. “Home is where you are.”

  Epilogue

  Crystal gathered a few things from her room and put them in a bag, then grabbed her laptop. The latter mostly because it had her personal photos on it. Terrien told her they would be able to convert the data she wanted into a form she could use on his world’s version of computers.

  She also gathered the paintings she’d done along with her paint supplies. Terrien took the portfolio and paint case and set them by her bag in the living room.

  “Are you ready?” he asked.

  She nodded. He took her hand and pressed the button on the little remote device he carried. Seconds later, they appeared in the small ship that had brought them from the larger spacecraft back to Earth.

  A plastic case with circular holes sat on the floor near one of the passenger seats. A distinctive sound—actually more like a complaint—emanated from the cage.

  “Is that a cat?” Crystal asked as she circled the box. On the other side, she saw a barred door. A small cat peered out at her and mewed.

  She glanced at Terrien. “Did you get me a cat?”

  “No, that is Aria’s cat, Rex. After you told me how people get attached to cats and other pets, we double-checked the other Earth women’s files and found that Aria had a cat. The captain sent me to retrieve him.”

  “So that’s what you did after you dropped me here? Went to get Aria’s cat?”